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Pages: Married and lonely women looking for affair Albert Lea MN [1]
Author Topic: Married and lonely women looking for affair Albert Lea MN

Posts: 1

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2010-09-19 14-10-28

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2010-10-03 11-34-30

sweet pea i'm looking for someone to spend time with.i don't want to play games. i just want a simple, fun guy who will let me in his life.this post married looking for married Zephyrhills West FL is pretty vague i realize, but that's okay with me.i'm a good girl, and can honestly say i'm worth your if you're looking for something simple and as uncomplicated as it can possibly get, you should e-mail me.24-24.:)thanks.
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2010-10-21 20-09-03

LOOKING FOR MR. RIGHT SEEKING MR. RIGHT I am looking for someone to share my life with; a Long Term Relationship. I am looking for someone who w hot sex women search for men Naperville ill be my partner, confidante & best friend. I enjoy going out to dinner & the movies, travelling, going to the beach walking barefoot in the sand holding hands with the man of my dreams & jumping the waves. I also enjoy cuddling on the couch & watching a movie together. I love receiving flowers for occasions & just because. I am a very passionate & affectionate person & seek same in my partner. I love to hold hands & have him put his arm around me. Activities I like are swimming, working out, playing tennis, playing racquet ball, bike riding, etc. I am seeking a tall, dark, handsome SWM between the ages of 30-49 who is not pending a divorce or has a wife. are okay. Just no wife. I seek a man who is in a stable job, has a driver’s license & a vehicle, has own apt. or house. I am looking for someone who is more into me than playing games on computer. I want a man who shares my interests; is looking for the same things in a relationship as me & it would be nice if we had“chemistry”. I AM NOT SEEKING A NIGHT STAND SO “PLAYERS NEED NOT RESPOND” D&D FREE. SOCIAL DRINKER ONLY. ABSOLUTELY NO DRUGS. NON-SMOKER ONLY. PREFER NO TATOOS. NO PIERCINGS.
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2010-11-06 20-37-19

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2011-01-13 14-08-16

date application Your name: Your email: Your age: Your sex: Female (This is non-negotiable. Sorry.) Your occupation: Where are you from?: Where do hot sex meet discreet South Wenatchee you live now?: Highest level of education completed/currently working towards: high school diploma high school equivalency (GED) associates degree bachelors degree master’s degree MBA/JD Ph.D./MD/DMD I go to the Vo-Tech, climb under a car, and sleep all day Jay Truck Driving School what’s edumacation? “When I grow up, I’m going to Bovine University!” How did you find this page?: Accidentally 48403/Google A friend told me An enemy told me You told me about your stupid page I can smell your desperation from here A scorching case of herpes led me here God hates me Blind hogs eventually find acorns “I fell off the jungle gym and woke up in here.” Why are you filling out this form?: I want to ask you out. HA! No, seriously, I really do want to ask you out I don’t want to go on a date with you, but I do want to buy you lots drinks and watch the train wreck develop I’m putting in fake info to fuck with you I’m horribly desperate for anything male, and you fit the bill This is the final stage in a destructive spiral of self-loathing and despair It’s either this or jail time This is helping me stop masturbating so much I hate your fucking guts “It says ‘I choo-choo-choose you,’ and it has a picture of a train.” Why do you think you want to go out on a date with me?: Because I want to go on a date with you. Do I need a reason? Isn’t is axiomatic? I want to hitch my wagon to your star, and this is Step 1. You seem interesting I think you’d be fun to get drunk with I want to end up in of your stories or future books I feel strangely attracted to you I hate myself I’m of those people who can’t divert their eyes from accident scenes, and you have that same effect on me I think your caustic and sarcastic exterior belies a sweet and caring inner self I want to give my VD to someone else before I die No, really, I enjoy having guys use me and treat me like shit “Which is oral?” What is it that you find most attractive about me?: Your caustic wit and ambitious verve Your cute face and hot body Your caustic wit and ambitious verve Your constant use of foul, discourteous language The way you show no regard for the feelings of others The way your immense ego blocks out any real emotional depth You make me laugh Your single-minded obsession with all things Jeremy I like how you never use deodorant. Your pheromones are too sexy to cover up I don’t like myself, and I’m hoping you’ll treat me like a used-up stripper Everything “You’re deceptive.” When would you like to go out with me?: Whenever When you are available Hey, we’re on my schedule here, Date Boy When your heart stops As soon as I finish gnawing off my left leg When I get over my herpes and pink eye After I suck off a Great Dane How about never? Is never good for you? “This is my sandbox, but I’m not allowed to go in the deep end.” How would you rate yourself in terms of your physical attractiveness?: I’m not very attractive I’m cute I’m cute enough for you, assface I’m hot If you like morbidly obese, cross-eyed fat girls, you’ll LOVE me I’m a butter face I’m a Chicago girl (it means you have a hot face and a fat ass…and don’t email me pissed about this. You don’t think that Jodeci video”, like a hot pink tank top and spandex shorts Something that says “hip Militia Man”, like a Patagonia fleece over Kevlar body armor Whatever you have that’s clean Surprise me Nothing at all “Daddy, these rubber pants are hot.” What will we do on our first date?: Go to dinner and a movie Mock those less fortunate than us Argue, yell and possibly even fight Fuck. What else would we do? Try to cripple ren Go to a gentlemen’s club and try and pick up a stripper Get absolutely shit-housed, fucked-in-half, retarded drunk Go to a gun range Get absolutely shit-housed, fucked-in-half, retarded drunk and go to a gun range with a stripper we picked up at a gentlemen’s club (…my personal choice) Felch each other (…decidedly not my choice) All of the above None of the above Some strange combination of the above “Will you cook my dinner for me? My parents aren’t around and I’m not allowed to turn on the stove.” What type of food will we eat, assuming we go to dinner?: Italian Chinese American Southwestern Vegan (yeah…have fun eating alone) Light post-coital snack Chick-fil-a Who needs to eat if liquor is available? I don’t eat–I’m a smack addict Whatever we find in the dumpster Nothing, I’m already too fat as it is “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.” What will we drink? (we will be drinking…or at least I’ll be drinking): champagne beer liquor fine malt liquor wine wine in a box fine apple wine whatever is cheapest whatever we can steal from homeless people whatever we can make in your bathtub I prefer hard drugs, thank you “They taste like…burning!” How much does it take to get you drunk?: The smell of alcohol A few beers A few glasses of wine A six-pack A six-pack of Ripple I can out drink a Wahoo I can out drink an Irish Catholic Ever heard of Motley Crue? I taught them how to party. “My parent’s won’t let me use scissors.” What will we talk about on our date?: Me You Sex Sex in public places Butt sex The sexual foibles of ex’s The etiquette of group sex What that slut at the next table is wearing How our parents fucked us up beyond all repair How much everyone around us sucks The epistemological and metaphysical implications of superstring theory The epistemological and metaphysical implications of us having sex The Iron Chef Whether or not Scooby Doo is in fact a metaphor for hallucinogenic drug use This web page Flannery O’Connor’s use of symbolism Herman Melville’s use of metaphor Ron Jeremy’s use of irony Lots of different things “Then, the doctor told me that BOTH my eyes were lazy! And that’s why it was the best summer ever.” I should compliment you by saying: “You have incredible eyes.” “That is the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen.” “You are a very cool person.” “Are you gonna finish that? Cause if not…” “You’re ugly, but you intrigue me.” “If you didn’t have such fat legs, you could be a model.” “You know, they can fix your cleft lip. Modern medicine has come a long way from the days of just throwing people like you in with the livestock.” “Good lord…was anyone else hurt in the accident?” “That tumor on your forehead really brings out the brown in your eyes.” “That’s the same perfume they put on my grandmother at her wake.” “Did you fart? You farted, didn’t you?” “I’d club a baby seal to get a second date with you.” “I had no idea a woman could have such a large ass paired with such small breasts.” “Can I pee on you?” “You don’t sweat much for a fattie.” “You should be on TV. They use plain looking women too.” “Your toys are fun to touch. Mine are all sticky.” Finish this sentence: “I like a man that… respects me.” worships me.” deifies me.” likes me more than a sharp stick in the eye.” treats me like shit.” (be honest…) likes to hurt small animals.” has spent a healthy amount of time in a maximum-security federal prison.” is uglier than me.” is uglier than Lyle Lovett.” is dumber than me.” is dumber than Dan Quayle.” makes toy cars out of his poop.” won’t make fun of my club foot.” “You look like my mommy after she drinks her box of wine.” What will we do after dinner?: Have coffee and dessert Run out on the bill Go dancing Go to hell Have a long and meaningful conversation Throw the dishes on the floor and fuck on the table Go somewhere to be alone, but just cuddle Point out each others shortcomings (my personal choice) Groping and pawing Why do I have to make all the decisions? I thought you were a fucking man! “Help! She’s touching my special area!” How will the date end?: Unpleasantly An awkward silence A noncommital hug A sweet, tender kiss Passionate, unbridled, hanging from the chandelier, sex Us planning for another date Me pouring my heart out to you while you record it to put on your website Me cursing you abusively from the safety of my porch Me ing the cops to get you out of my house You throwing flaming bags of dog poop at my porch A nonspecific burning sensation of us waking up in jail without our shoe laces “Oh boy sleep! That’s where I’m a Viking!” If you made it this far, I’m sure you have something to say. If you want me to email you back, you need to write something here. Preferably something funny, intelligent, witty, etc.:
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Posts: 28

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2011-07-01 16-54-53

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